Survivalism

What gets me about the survivalists is the idiocy they display in choosing what skills they learn in order to survive. They all go to camps that teach basic small unit infantry tactics, so they can all play Ricky Ranger running around the woods. But none of them study dentristy. None of them learn how to tan leather so they can make shoes to replace the Gortex-lined boots that are eventually going to wear out. All of them buy Rambo knives that can gut a grizzly in one swipe but none of them try to learn blacksmithing so they can make new knives. Those things are too hard. They require thought as well as effort, and that isn’t sexy. That doesn’t make their dicks hard when they brag in the bars about being survivalists. So when everything has run out, when all their ammunition is gone and they can’t make black powder muzzle loaders because none of them had the foresight to build a forge, and they’re naked or wearing nothing but ragged stinking animal pelts and dirt because none of them ever learned how to weave cloth and they weren’t exctited about learning how to grow flax, and they all have scurvy and pallegra and a myriad of skin diseases because none of them knows anything about medicine, they can be proud of the fact that they are the most badass infantry in they new caveman rock throwing army.

From the Gawker comments.

20.01.2012 • Permalink